Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Voodoo Hockey Cards Hex Star

Fake Press

Calgary, Alberta, Canada (FP) - Flames netminder, Miikka Kiprusoff, will start treatment for what he understands is some weird voodoo curse.


"Sharp pains have been occurring in random places, as if he was being hit by darts," Dr. Weatherley, a voodoo medicine specialist said in a statement, "where the only treatment is the rubbing of several potions and the ingestion of animal parts."

Kiprusoff, 30, wasn't going to make excuses as to the reason why the Flames were ousted by the Detroit Red Wings in the first round of the playoffs last season, but does credit the sharp pains with some of his inconsistency through the season. It was unclear when the pains started with the Finnish netminder, but he does recall some pains early on in the season and found that the pains were sharper and more frequent when the Flames travelled on road trips.

Voodoo hockey cards are still relatively new in the magic world, not considered one of the more popular types of memoribilia for sports hexing. In recent years, however, the voodoo magic has made it's way into the Canadian sports underbelly and has picked up steam in the CFL of all places. Hockey cards were always found to be so flimsy and not worthy of long-term hexing.

The trading card understood to be hexing the one-time Vezina trophy winner is thought to also be encased in a thick plastic, all the more reason why the spell has lasted so long. Once the card has come apart completely, the spell is broken. But doctors here in Calgary are hoping that the hex can be broken with a little bit of voodoo magic of their own as training camp is about to open this week.

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